It’s been a while since we’ve had a serving of Simon Cowell’s fluffy chest pies, but here he is bringing them to the table. Somebody better put a hand towel under Ryan Gaycrest’s booster seat, because this is going to start a flood.
Simon took his luscious drops of heaven and 8-lane happy highway for a walk in Nice, France, where he’s vacationing on a fancy yacht with his fiancee Mezhgan Hussainy. Simon’s Alfala-like part in his hair has got me thinking if the carpet matches the drapes? Like I need to ask. You know that right after Simon kisses each of his nipples first thing in the morning, he meticulously parts his pube bush with a Barbie comb.
That being said, I still would. Well, you could exfoliate your skin while motorboating Simon! Dude has got loofah titties!