Tiny Got Married!
Sorry, Chelsea Clinton and Marc Mezvinsky, the Wedding of the Year has already taken place so I guess you have to settle for the title of Wedding of the Evening Between the Hours of 6 and 8. UsWeekly reports that T.I. and the mother of his two children Tameka “Tiny” Cottle made it legal at a Miami Beach courthouse yesterday after almost 10 years together. The bride wore a “FUCKING FINALLY” face and the groom wore a pair of beer goggle eyeballs (as always).
Tiny and T.I.’s wedding tour will continue today on a small island off the coast of Miami. They will exchange vows in front of their friends and family. Then everyone will get on a plane and fly to Atlanta for another wedding reception. And if Tiny doesn’t pass out in her trough by then, the plan is to fly to Las Vegas later tonight for a third reception with their friends.
Somebody lock down the lily pond, because the last thing T.I. needs is for Kermit the Frog to crash one of the wedding receptions to steal his bride.
And hopefully, the orchestra at one of their ten million receptions plays this when Tiny strolls into the room: