Mad Mel: The B-Sides!!!

Mel Gibson’s biggest nightmare isn’t Hello Kitty (You know, because she has no mouth to blow him with. It’s Monday.), it’s a recording device! Oksana Grigorieva not only kept all the secret recordings of Mel giving her that sweet sweet talk, but she also put his voicemails in a file titled “Now who’s blowing who, cunt?!” And one of Mel’s executioners, Radar Online, has rolled out the first of many.

In this one, Mel delivers the phrase of the day, “glum cunt,” tells OctoSana that she should go fuck her ex Timothy Dalton, and even tells her to get it on with another piece while her son watches. When is Mel going to put down the phone and write for hentai porn already, because that’s his true calling.

If you’re sick of your carbon monoxide detector going off every time it hears Mel’s voice, here’s a few more touching quotes from him. It’s basically the same old glum cunt shit:

“Did you get my last message about me being a bad father, and Tim (Timothy Dalton) being a great dad now? You didn’t hear that one? Well, you should go and f*ck him (Dalton), you know, you fickle cunt because I don’t care.”

“Okay. The game’s over. Let the new games begin so you can get it on with anybody else and your son can watch it. What is it? Number 45 he’s going to have to look at? Fucking good.”

“You’re a fucking fake. You’re a fucking sham. You don’t know what the fuck it means to make a man happy. You didn’t make me fucking happy., I couldn’t make you happy with the BEST I DID FOR ANYBODY, EVER! EVER. You fucking glum cunt!”

If Mel spent less time blowing his rage into the phone, and more time blowing a bong, he wouldn’t be in this mess! Whoever is trying to fully legalize the good shit in California can use these tapes as a selling tool, because Mel sounds like he needs a bong shoved into both his holes.

And if there’s a Hell below Hell, Mel will find it, because he just keeps digging and digging…