Nicolas Cage Does Not Push Luggage Carts!

July 23, 2010 / Posted by:

Add this to the list of “Things Nicolas Cage Does Not Do” right under: “Nicolas Cage does not feast on animals that don’t lift their pinkies when fucking.” Blame it on the shot of hazelnut creamer I just downed, but these pictures of Nicolas Cage arriving at LAX yesterday made me laugh. There’s Nicolas Cage struttin’ his ass while a lady slave/cart pusher on the phone trails behind him. AND homegirl is most likely on a Nicolas Cage-related call.

I’m guessing she’s trying to phone bid in an auction for a rare albino T-Rex pubic bone, or genuine moat water from Camelot, or some other shit Nicolas Cage cannot afford. You know what else Nicolas Cage can’t afford? A fucking lady cart pusher! But my ass isn’t being fair, how can Nicolas Cage bask in the glory of his own ridiculous fuckery while pushing a luggage cart? Fancy sorcerers don’t push luggage carts!

Tags:
SHARE
Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >