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July 13, 2010 / Posted by:

The God Flops – The flip-flops for Christians and by Christians!

School teacher Shannon Hayes of Tampa, FL was at the beach one day when shook her head at a bunch of bad teens doing hood rat stuff. It was at that moment that God took a seat on her Tropicana Oil-covered shoulder and gave her the idea of putting his word on flip-flops and selling them for $20 a pair to the masses! And that’s how the Walk the Walk flip-flops were born! Yes, God won’t sue you for copyright infringement as long as you put his words on classy shit like flip-flops. Shannon explains to the Sun Sentinel:

I know what a divine calling is now. I know that sounds kinda weird, but I really do feel that God told me to do this. And I see that every time I’m worried or stressed out about something, he points me in a new direction and it all works out. So I know it was the right thing to do.

You know, Shannon might be on to something. If Shannon really wants to be rolling around in a pool full of blessed hundred dollar bills, then she should tweak this idea bit. Shannon needs to come out with a Spanish edition that she can sell for 2 for $19.99 (my abuelita falls for those kinds of tricks) at El Super. The flip-flops should have a platform wedge with the Last Supper painted on the side of them. Shannon can call them SANTO DIOS CHANKLAS! That’s where the money is at. Because abuelitas everywhere would get a new sense of pleasure knowing that the chankla that is about to hit your smug face is covered with the word of GOD. Get on that, Shannon!

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