The Naked Cowboy Takes On The Naked Cowgirl

June 22, 2010 / Posted by:

Do you see the dazzling cactus flower on the right wearing a wig she snatched out of a Dolly Parton costume bag from the 99 Cent Store and her face covered in make-up that was applied by an old drag queen who suffers from an essential tremor? Well, that’s the Naked Cowgirl of NYC and she’s nobody’s ho! But the Naked Cowboy thinks otherwise and he has skipped on over to her corner to slip a cease and desist into her g-string. The Naked Cowboy wants her to stop using the name the “Naked Cowgirl” unless she pays him a $500 a month franchise fee! Basically, the Naked Cowboy wants to be her pimp. Homegirl is way too old to be someone’s bitch, hooker.

According to People, 39-year-old Robert Burck (Ho name: The Naked Cowboy) owns the trademark for the Naked Cowboy and anybody who wants to use the name professionally has to pay him. The Naked Cowboy sued Mars Inc. a couple of years ago for using a naked cowboy M&M as part of an advertising campaign. His lawyer says that the Naked Cowgirl is clearly violating his trademark and they will sue her hot ass if she doesn’t comply.

The Naked Cowgirl (government name: Sandy Kane), an old time stripper who was famous for lighting her tits on fire, says that she’s been doing the nekkid thing way before the Naked Cowboy came around. She says, “I’ve been naked for years. You know how much money I make? Two dollars a picture. I’m not selling any products. The song ain’t going anywhere anyways. It’s not like he’s Tim McGraw or Keith Urban.”

All of us should file a class action lawsuit against the Naked Cowboy for fraud and false advertising, because dude does not get nekkid! The last time I checked being nekkid didn’t include a pair of tighty whiteys covering your parts! When you see the name “NAKED COWBOY” you expect to see a bare peen lassoing a hog. He should change his name to Cock Tease Cowboy.

By the way, that class action lawsuit will not include the Naked Cowgirl. It’s best that she keeps her chonies on as much as possible. You know, because I don’t think any of us can take seeing her beauty in all its spectacular glory.

(Images via Flickr & Flickr)

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