The Plot Thickens (Sort Of)

June 18, 2010 / Posted by:

26-year-old Brandon Ray Adams is sitting a jail cell today after he was arrested for ALLEGEDLY ALLEGEDLY ALLEGEDLY (shout that from a Vuvuzela) kidnapping Jeremy London in Palm Springs and forcing him to smoke crack and become the Robin Hood of the “gang areas” by handing out free booze. Brandon pleaded “not guilty” yesterday. Well, there’s a chance that Jeremy might be joining Brandon in jail to relive the precious moments they shared together, because there’s a warrant out for his arrest. The warrant has nothing to do with the Palm Springs incident, though.

Radar reports that Jeremy is currently on probation for a DUI from 2004. This past January, Jeremy was slapped with driving without a license. When Jeremy didn’t show up to court to face the charge, a bench warrant was issued for his arrest. The warrant is still out.

Meanwhile, Brandon’s friends and neighbors say that Jeremy London pulled that Six Feet Under shit out of his ass. While they believe that Brandon and Jeremy smoked crack together, they don’t think their friend would ever force the dude from 7th Heaven to breathe in the bad shit smoke. One of Brandon’s friends, Captain Obvious, added, “The guy (Jeremy) just said he was forced to smoke because he knew drugs were in his system.

If Jeremy needed to throw someone in front of the cops, he didn’t need to grab Brandon. Has Jeremy ever heard of the infamous Crackhead Leprechaun of Mobile, Alabama? Everybody knows how that shifty little leprechaun crackie works. It sits in the trees just waiting for an innocent victim to pass by, so it can drag them back to his crackhouse under the rainbow and turn them. Ask Wino! Ask Doherty! Ask Whitney! And if Jeremy pointed his finger at the Crackhead Leprechaun, we’d all win because we’d get more of the Crackhead Leprechaun on the news! Well, everybody would win except for Jeremy’s internal organs since he’s probably a crackhead and all….

And will somebody please tell Mischa Barton to stop driving around Palm Springs with a flat tire. Luck is not going to strike twice! Especially for her!

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