After months of playing Mary J. Blige’s “Not Gon’ Cry” on repeat while cutting Vanilla Gorilla’s face out of pictures and replacing it with Keanu Reeves’, Sandra Bullock came out to play last night at Spike TV’s Guys Choice Awards. Sandra showed up to pick up yet another award to add to her trophy collection which is housed in a giant warehouse in the Valley somewhere. Sandra won the “Troops Choice” award for Entertainer of the Year. And Sandra even joked that she probably won the award because she got fucked in a bad way this year.
Sandra said: “Let’s be honest here, just for a moment. We’re all going to be honest, right? Did I win this for being entertainer of the year, or did I win this because of the spectacular I.E.D. [improvised explosive device] explosion that became my personal life?! No, it’s okay. Because I would do it over again if it was to entertain our troops , and our extraordinary troops deserve something much more than some actress in a tight dress talking about herself.”
And wouldn’t that award look so much better if it was shoved up Vanilla Gorilla and Bombshit McGee’s assholes? Actually, they would probably like that too much so forget about that.
Here’s the video of Sandra’s speech: