Suri, Come And Get These Bitches!

June 6, 2010 / Posted by:

The MTV Movie Awards (yes, they still shit out that shit) took us back to the 2008 tonight when Tommy Girl sashayed out as Len Grossman and proceeded to bust out some kind of Scientology dance ritual of seduction that makes Xenu rip his E.T. underoos off and shut the door to his mom’s basement every time. See what I mean:

Seriously, it was just a regular Sunday night for Tommy Girl, because he drops these same moves every week. But usually he does it in the deepest part of his dungeon….while completely nekkid……and surrounded by lubed up dudes…..with a double-sided butt plug in his Scientolohole. It was nice of him to share though! That wasn’t the most terrifying part of this mess though. That came when JLo blatantly tried to wig snatch Charo! Why does this bitch think she’s the next Charo? Charo has more glamour and talent in one of her ass lips than JLo has in her whole life! The day JLo is hailed as the new Charo is the day all coochies die. Coochie coochie NO!

And if you ever find yourself in a Scientology audit, just tell them that watching this performance in its entirety is the worst thing you’ve ever done in your life.

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