Open Post: Hosted By A Bouquet Of Beautiful Blossoms

June 1, 2010 / Posted by:

The streets of Miami Beach were transformed into the Garden of Eden over the weekend when a bevy of demure and elegant flowers joined together for Urban Beach Week. This is what Aphrodite’s chambers look like in heaven.

Everywhere you turned there was a crystal-covered beauty more ravishing than the last wearing weaves made of Pegasus’ mane and bikinis bought in roadside gas stations near Ft. Lauderdale. Bitches probably got arthritis in their knees from curtsying before so many refined ladies. Or maybe they got arthritis in the knees from dodging all the skank bugs flying around.

And yes, this is why every strip club was closed during the day shift in case your uncle was asking.

Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

alt="drupal analytics" >