Alicia Keys Is Knocked Up And Engaged
Alicia Keys’ spokeswhore confirms she’s got a case of the babies and the father is her piece of over a year rapper Swizz Beatz. And Alicia’s not taking her bow just yet, because she also said she’s getting married to Swiss Beatz later this year. And here I was thinking that Alicia Keys only got moist when she had a little labia on her tongue. I for one am floooored (not really).
Their rep tells People: “Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz are expecting a baby and are engaged to be married in a private ceremony later this year. They’re very happy.”
This will be Alicia’s first kid and Swizz’s third. Swizz started bumping it with Alicia while he was married to Mashonda. Bitch jumped from one family to the next like when Shelly Long leaped from rock to rock in Outrageous Fortune.
Mashonda later wrote an open letter to Alicia, which I hope she’ll read at the wedding after she crashes that shit. WELL, I’m always hoping for Dynasty moments! And that wedding is going to be the best, because instead of throwing rice everyone is going to throw side-eyes and lip smacks.
Here’s Alicia looking like the plastic flower section at Michael’s just barfed all over her while walking the red carpet at some event in NYC London today. This was before she announced her engagement to Alice the Goon.
