Adrien Brody Is Scared Of Rapey Gay Goats

May 26, 2010 / Posted by:

Note to Billy Goat Brad Pitt: If you ever have dinner at Adrien Brody’s house, make sure to be on your best gentlemanly behavior or you’ll be sent to Sonoma, CA forever. You’ve been warned.

Adrien Brody tried to buy two lady goats for his New York farm, but instead he was sold two dude goats. Not just any dude goats, one of his goats had a giant peen that could cause horns to splinter. And the big dicked goat really wanted to put his shit to use, which made Adrien scream for his mommy.

Adrien explains, “The more well-endowed goat took a liking to the other one and I swear it was traumatic. There was a lot of crying and goat noises and I felt incredibly guilty and I didn’t know what to do. I had homosexual goats. It’s best when you have goats that are that gay to just let them free… because I felt that they were in captivity and the one was receiving a lot of aggression on the other one’s behalf… so I sent them off to Sonoma.

Sodomy in Sonoma! Now we really know why George Clooney won’t stop staring at goats.

You know, I don’t want to remember Adrien Brody for his perfectly sculpted Afghan Hound face, his erect penis nose or his impeccable fashion sense. I want to remember Adrien Brody for his fear of gay goats with big dicks.

And Nicolas Cage wants you all to know that he will never ever eat those goats.

via Toronto Sun

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