This Isn’t Helping

May 24, 2010 / Posted by:

Instead of picking out ensembles that will go perfectly with her SCRAM bracelet (which is what she should be doing!), Lindsay Lohan gave a totally bullshit interview to a scary omni-powerful voice in Blanche Devereaux’s bedroom.

If your eyeballs are feeling lazy this morning and they don’t feel like rolling continuously, let me break it down for you: BITCH DENIES EVERYTHING. Lindsay says she isn’t eating the bad shit and was only in Cannes to promote her movie. If this was an audition tape for Intervention, bitch would get the job.

I mean, if Lindsay wanted to look like she was at least trying to tell the truth, she should’ve told the interviewer to hold a bottle of Jack over the camera so her shifty eyes could focus on one thing instead of searching the room for a fucking clue.

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