Hot Slut Of The Day!

May 23, 2010 / Posted by:

Claire’s raggedy ass crazy wig of mange from Lost

When Claire crossed over to the dark side, she really embraced her newfound craziness by putting a tortured creature on her head that looks like it spent most of its days eating flies and frog skins in the swamp.

It’s as if one of Brit Brit’s old weaves tried to off itself by jumping off the Santa Monica Pier, but instead of dying a painful death it was swept out into the ocean and washed up on the shores of Hawaii where a seagull ate it up and immediately barfed it out on a pile of seal shit. And that’s where the Lost producers found it.

Seriously, the Smoke Monster ain’t shit. The real demon on that island is living and breathing on Claire’s head. Hopefully, there’s a shampoo and deep conditioning station waiting at end of the tunnel of light (aka Shauna Sand’s vagina), so Claire can get that dreadful situation taken care of.

One of the many unanswered questions that needs to be addressed tonight is why the hell one of Claire’s so-called friends didn’t take a hot comb to Claire’s wretched wig upon first sight? Hell, they could’ve wiped some grease off of Sawyer’s face and fed it to Claire’s thirsty wig. They need to send that wig to the Gulf of Mexico to clean up the oil spill. Claire’s wig is the real beautiful tragedy on that show.

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