AFTER ALL THAT, People has confirmed that the answer to the “Who is coming out?” blind item is country singer Chely Wright (aka WHO?!). Chely’s lesbian non-bomb was supposed to drop this Wednesday, but People came clean this morning after everyone and their bikini waxer spoiled the news over the weekend. Yes, this is what it feels like to get a wet handjob without release. Let’s all bump blue balls while cursing People’s name.
Chely, who has a book and a CD coming out this week, queefs to People, “There had never, ever been a country music artist who had acknowledged his or her homosexuality (Ed note: K.D. Lang just shank eyed bitch). I wasn’t going to be the first. Nothing in my life has been more magical than the moment I decided to come out.”
You know what will be more magical? The feeling Chely will get in her heart when she sees the extra sales from her CD and book because of her People Magazine cover. Nothing hugs your soul and makes you feel clean like a publicity stunt. Good for you, Chely.
Not all is lost though. At least I got to post this picture of Chely wearing a truly hot outfit. Thanks to Chely I can now wear a window scarf as a waist accessory with confidence!