Opulence Epitomized

Brynne Gordon, the gold digging California dew drop who married an old ass Australian millionaire, was the toast of the Logie Awards in Australia on Sunday night. And what I mean by that is everybody at the show had to toast and down gallons of booze to fully embrace Brynne’s beauty.

Now I know you’re assuming that Brynne’s one-of-a-kind luxurious gown must have been bought from a couture house in Paris, but get ready to suffer a blow to your mind because she designed it herself! YES, Brynne is a woman of a million talents. We still don’t know what those talents are, but she has many of them!

Brynne’s dress, which is the exact shade of the tears her husband’s checking account cried when he married her, was made with the finest French silk from Taiwan and jewels she wore to her wedding. It’s like Moulin Rouge meets Marie Antoinette meets the front of a dump truck. Elegantly understated as always.

Below is a clip of Brynne talking about her to dress to the Herald Sun.

Brynne should narrate the Guantanamo Bay orientation video, because her voice is as soothing as a handjob from Freddy Krueger.