Demi Moore Says She’s All-Natural (Almost)

It has been claimed that Demi Moore’s body has been sucked more than Gerard Butler on any given weeknight, tucked more than the entire cast of RuPaul’s Drag Race, and stretched more than Gay Al’s b-hole during White Party weekend, but she tells Elle UK (via DM) this isn’t so. Demi says that she used to be obsessed with the way her body image, but now she doesn’t really give a dirty tampon.

Demi says, “I had an extreme obsession with my body. I made it a measure of my own value. I tried to dominate it, which I did, and I changed it multiple times over. But it never lasted and ultimately it didn’t bring me anything but temporary happiness. Does being thin resolve anything? No. The irony is that when I abandoned that desire to dominate my body, it actually became the body that I’d always wanted. But it only happened when I stopped trying to control it. At the end of the day, this kind of obsession is pointless and meaningless.”

And about that plastic surgery rumor, Demi says, “I have had something done but it’s not on my face. It feels like school-yard name-calling a lot of the time. It hurts. You know what? Maybe one day I’ll go under the knife. It just irritates me that people are constantly saying how much I’ve spent on plastic surgery.”

Anybody who watched Striptease knows that “something she had done.” Well, unless Moses magically appeared before her and parted her tittays for some strange reason. You know, the only way Demi Moore never had any plastic surgery on her face is if she has the same genetic make up as Julie Masking.

And you know that somewhere in the world, there’s a plastic surgeon’s knife pissed off and hurt that Demi Moore is denying ever meeting it. That heartless bitch!