Woe Is Whitney

April 7, 2010 / Posted by:

Whitney Houston’s rep says that she is still laid up in a bed suffering from an upper respiratory infection, so she has been forced to reschedule more dates on her European tour. Damn. Why did I suddenly wonder what Whitney’s sick room stanks like? Let’s not open that door.

Anyway, Whitney was unable to take the stage in Paris last night, and her rep is now saying that she will also have to postpone concerts in Manchester and Glasgow. Dealer’s…..I mean….Doctor’s orders! Whitney is expected to begin her tour in Birmingham, England on Tuesday.

While Whitney’s rep is screaming that she’s got violent nose diarrhea, others are throwing the “crack” word around. It also doesn’t help that in this week’s InTouch, they have a story from some dude who claims he saw Whitney snorting a line of Lohan dust in the middle of a restaurant. From InTouch:

In Touch can reveal shocking claims from onlookers at the Beverly Wilshire hotel in LA who were surprised on March 10 when the singer walked into the bar, appearing disheveled and out of it.

According to eyewitness Marlon David, Whitney was with her ex-husband, Bobby Brown, and she seemed oblivious to who might be watching when she began screaming, “I want a fuckin’ drink!” followed by expletives. While Whitney’s rep vehemently denies that she’s using drugs, David, who was sitting just a table away from Whitney and Bobby, tells In Touch exclusively: “I saw her pull a plastic bag out, put a folded bill to her nose and discreetly snort a line from it of what to me certainly looked like cocaine. She’s extremely thin and looks like a disaster. She’s a hot mess.”

According to David, Bobby — who says he’s now clean — and has lost weight since competing on Celebrity Fit Club — seemed to be disgusted with Whitney’s behavior. “He had so much trouble trying to control her,” says David. “He tried to make her leave, but she wouldn’t. She started yelling his name loudly and calling him a stupid son of a bitch, and he told her to shut the fuck up.”

Aw. It sounds like Whitney and Bobby B are back in love. Quick! Get a camera crew on them NOW! And honestly, what is so bad about Whitney demanding a “fuckin’ drink.” Isn’t that the first thing everyone says when they first walk into a place. We walk into church and scream, “I want a fuckin’ drink!” We walk into a hospital room to visit our ailing aunt and scream, “I want a fuckin’ drink!” We walk into court to answer to charges of disorderly conduct and scream, “I want a fuckin’ drink!” We walk into a private dining room at The Olive Garden for the last supper with Jesus and scream, “I want a fuckin’ drink!”

Furthermore, we shouldn’t assume that Whitney was snorting the bad shit. Maybe it was Miralax to liquefy her doody bubbles? Possible!

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