No, Neal McDonough Will Not Have Fake Sex With You

Neal McDonough, the dude who played Edie’s psychotic murderer husband on Desperate Housewives, was recently replaced with David James Elliott just a few days into shooting the ABC show Scoundrels. No reason was given at the time, but Deadline Hollywood says that Neal was dumped by the network after he refused to bump protective crotch patches with his co-star Virginia Madsen.

A source says that Neal, who is married with chirruns, won’t do faux fuck times with anybody, because it conflicts with his strong Catholic beliefs. Another source tells Popeater, “It wasn’t just heated love scenes. He wouldn’t do any kissing whatsoever, even though those scenes were clearly in the scripts he read before taking the role.”

ABC knew where Neal’s line was since he also refused to do love scenes with Nicolette Sheridan in Desperate Housewives.

Neal is reportedly losing out on $1 million, which is what he would’ve been paid for his work on Scoundrels.

So this explains why Jesus Christ rudely ignored my DMs on Twitter by not gifting the world with a Dave Williams/Carlos Solis/Mike Delfino/Orson Hodge circle jerk scene on Desperate Housewives.