Jessica Simpson might have the shit that makes dicks go boom, but her new reality show The Price Of Beauty failed to ignite. Basically, the price of Jessica’s beauty is worth a used ticket to the chili cook-off and a pair of gently worn mom jeans.
The Los Angeles Times (via UsWeekly) reports that Vh1’s The Price of Beauty brought in 1 million viewers during its premiere on Monday night. 2.3 million people watched the premiere of Fantasia’s Vh1 reality show a couple of months ago.
Vh1 had this to say about Jessica’s ratings: “We’re very pleased with the show. A million-and-a-half viewers tuned in that night to see the first episode. We expect that audience to build even more.”
The Price of Beauty got beat by the History Channel’s “Pawn Stars,” BET’s “Rip the Runway,” and TruTV’s “Operation Repo.”
Jessica shouldn’t cry in Papa Joe’s lap*, because if you have to get beat in the ass by a bitch, it might as well be by Operation Repo’s resident goddess of glamour SONIA (see the ravishing creature above). Jessica should be honored.
And if Jessica really wants to beat Sonia, she needs to grab a Sharpie and work on her eyebrow game (SPOILER ALERT: She still wouldn’t beat Sonia).
*Seriously, don’t ever cry in Papa Joe’s lap, Jessica. You’ll get a poke in the eye, and you don’t want that. Just stay away!