You know Gaycrest is kicking himself in his b-hole for not bringing his iPhone with him to the Oscars tonight, because you know the Grindr app is going to be burning the fuck up (smells like rug burned nalgas) tonight!
Anyway, the red carpet on E! started a few minutes ago, so you can point, laugh and dry heave at those hos here on the open post. I just saw Zoe Saldana on the screen and bitch looks like she belongs on top of a Quinceanera cake.
My ass will be drunkblogging the ceremony at 8:30pm EST. In the meantime, I’m going to prepare for that shit by giving my liver and bong a pep talk.