Finally, A TRUE Beauty

March 4, 2010 / Posted by:

All day long I’ve been wishing for something or someone to come along to class this joint up a bit. You know, a thing of real beauty to take the focus off the crusty stains in the carpet or that old pizza box on the floor that you refuse to throw away. Well, someone up there (SPOILER ALERT: Besus Arthur) has answered my prayers, because look at what the mini-mall plastic surgeon dragged in! BEHOLD!

Wipe the crust off your mouth, put some pants on and wash out our one good cup, because there’s a real lady in our presence!

Doesn’t she look like a nymphet princess covered in crystal pure rain drops and the tears of virgin angels? This is rare! You only find ravishing beauties like this at a Vh1 casting call or slouched over a toilet in the bathroom of a strip club.

The paparazzi claim that the dude escorting Dlisted’s new beauty ambassador is Nikki Sixx. Yeah, that’s not Nikki Sixx. That’s Patti Stanger dressed as Nikki Sixx. Do you blame her? I too would dress up like Nikki Sixx if it meant I got to hold the precious hand of a modern day Aphrodite.

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