Hot Slut Of The Day!
Samantha Lynne Frazier, the BBW who says that her love handles saved her life! Aretha Franklin and Kirstie Alley both just found their new messiah.
Samantha Lynne Frazier just has one tip to staying alive: EAT everything at the buffet and keep going back for more! GRAB ALL THE PLATES! Because according to Samantha Lynne, her lardy lard rolls stopped a bullet from killing her.
This past weekend in Atlantic City, Samantha Lynne walked into a bar (they had a special on beer and wings) when she heard two gun shots. Samantha looked down at her chunk and noticed one of her love handles was bleeding. Unfortunately, it wasn’t barbecue sauce.
Police said that the gunman was aiming for a different bitch, but hit Samantha instead.
Samantha told the Press of Atlantic City, “I could have been dead. They said my love handles saved my life.” Samantha also said that she had been “hollering” about losing weight, but she has changed her mind after finding out that her fat is nature’s bullet proof vest. As Samantha said this next sentence, Aretha’s arteries shook in fear, “I want to be as big as I can if it’s going to stop a bullet.”
If you’re thinking to yourself, “Well, the bullet would’ve missed her if she was smaller,” kill that thought with a delicious stack of pancakes with extra butter. Do not repeat that every again! Just get yourself a weave and keep eating! It will save your life.