This afternoon, Jennifer Aniston will buy hundreds of copies of each of these tabloids, go home, spread them all over her bed, get nekkid and then roll around on top of them for HOURS. THE JOY! And when she goes to the doctor tomorrow, she’ll tell him that the small cuts on her labia came from one of her 50 cats who mistook it for a toy.
As expected, the tabloids gifted us with some amazing headlines and covers this week. According to the tabloids, the cookie dough version of Krystle Carrington is winning this round.
InTouch says that Aniston met Zahara and Shiloh in NYC LAST MARCH (who cares about being timely). OK! says that Aniston and Brad reunited at the buffet line at the telethon for Haiti last week. And Star Magazine says that Brad has already cried on Aniston’s chin about his shitty relationship with St. Angie.
I’m going to choose to believe all of this. It’s the only way to play.