Tater Tot’s New Look

January 20, 2010 / Posted by:

Tater Tot, the 4-year-old boy who was put on in-school suspension after he refused to take a pair of scissors to his luxurious bob, has been allowed back in class as long as he keeps his hair in a double French braid. Tater Tot’s mom Elizabeth Taylor (who is the spitting image of this Elizabeth Taylor) has been trying to find a way that her son can go to class without cutting his beautiful mop.

The school’s dumb ass policy states that every boy’s hair must be kept out of the eyes and can’t drop lower than the earlobes. Tater Tot’s day isn’t complete without flipping his hair while humming the Salon Selectives jingle, so he really didn’t want to chop his locks. Elizabeth Taylor worked with the school’s principal and came to the agreement that Tater Tot can sit with his fellow classmates if he wears his new ‘do.

Why didn’t I have Tater Tot’s problems when I was his age? I used to put a pair of control-top panty hose (sorry mom) over my head and pretend it was a flowing waterfall of luscious hair. I would’ve given up my Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine to be able to wear a French braid that made me look like I was about to bust into a pirouette before leaping across the floor like a graceful swan.

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