Because everyone knows that the quickest way to becoming a fag’s main hag is to charm his mother, the gay fly paper known as Squinty Zellweger hung all over Bradley Cooper’s mother while shopping for furniture in Los Angeles the other day. B.Coop’s mama je’e, who kind of looks like Janice the Muppet after eating Fozzy Bear, was in town for the Christmas holiday.
Squinty looks like she just swallowed an entire bong. Acting all giggly and shit. Bitch needs to keep it together. And B. Coop’s mother looks like she’s trying to figure out why her son’s lovely new boyfriend uses the ladies restroom and keeps tampons under his bathroom sink.