Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

December 21, 2009 / Posted by:

He wants this so badly, to be taken seriously as an actor. But on the set of his new movie, everyone is baffled. By how terrible he is. Like laughably terrible. The worst timing, the most awkward line reads, cheesy expressions… at this point it’s become a fun work-time activity: watch him get through a scene, feel the fontrum for him while he sucks it so hard so obliviously, giggle your tits off later because he walks around thinking he is the sweetest sh-t ever.

There’s an ego involved, of course, and he actually thinks he’s doing a good job, that he is gifted in this discipline too. Please. He is not gifted. And his lack of gifts in this respect could cost the entire production. The weakest link drags it all down. Which is why people are mystified that the director has not bothered to fix it. Like suggesting more classes, like pushing his coach, like replacing him with someone who can actually do it? None of the above. Word is, he’ll make the corrections in post by greatly reducing the role. Unless there’s a miracle and suddenly Cate Blanchett comes out of his ass to save the day. Not likely. (Lainey Gossip)

Justin Timberlake and the Facebook movie? They can easily fix this. When all else fails, get Justin to take his top off. They can re-work the movie to be about a man’s difficult journey in choosing the perfect shirtless picture to use as his Facebook default photo.

Which sometime emaciated Hollywood A-lister is demanding that her people step up her arrangement with her current actor beau so that they get engaged quite soon, to help with publicity for her next movie? While he went along with the contracted relationship quite happily his star is rising fast enough for him to have second thoughts about the next step. (Popbitch via Blind Gossip)

Squinty Zellweger needs to slow down or she’ll scare the gay off!

Which geeky actor from a popular TV show tried to pull a fast one on an established retailer? Several months ago, he set his sites on a particular item and asked the retailer if he could have it. They told him that although they would not simply gift it to him, they were willing to entertain a reasonable offer for it. He never made an offer. A few months later, he came back, wanting the same item again. This time, he fired off an angry email, claiming that the item was stolen from him. Perhaps he theorized that they would believe him and simply hand the item over to him?

The company took his claim seriously and began an investigation of the provenance of the item. However, when they asked him for any kind of legitimate proof that it was his, he realized that he was caught in a lie and quickly backed off. Then, instead of blowing the dust off his wallet and buying it, he began whining very publicly about it. We don’t know if he will get sued for making defamatory statements, but his false accusations against the retailer – and subsequent public whining and playing the victim to gain sympathy – just make him look like a big jerk. (Blind Gossip)

I really don’t have a clue, but for some reason this blind item made me think of Monroe Ficus from Too Close For Comfort. So I thank this blind item, because anything that makes you think of Monroe Ficus is doing God’s work.

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