The World Will Stop Turning In 2010

When are we going to start a foundation to help the endangered species known as the soap opera? They are all thirstay and in dire need of a drop of water in the form of 300,000 viewers at least. Unfortunately, it’s too late for As The World Turns and it will breathe its last breath in September 2010. CBS issued this statement:

As The World Turns, the long-running daytime drama, will complete its final season on the CBS Television Network in September 2010. CBS has decided not to renew the show for the 2010/2011 broadcast season, thereby ending its 54-year run on the Network.

“Throughout our history, As The World Turns has remained dedicated to sharing compelling stories that have entertained fans for more than five decades,” said Executive Producer Chris Goutman. “We are disappointed and saddened by the news that the show is not being renewed. It will certainly be a loss for all of us, and for the show’s loyal audience.”

You better tightly hug your favorite soap opera of choice, because it might be next! This is terrible news, because this means there will be less catfights, man stealing, baby switching and gold digging on TV.

And ATWT really tried! They did. They even had a dude-on-dude action on their show:

Usually, gay sex SAVES everything, but not in this case. Oh, gay sex, you have disappointed me so! YOU ARE DEAD TO ME (No, you aren’t. I just said that for theatrical purposes).