Did LiLo Lick On Cash?

Unfortunately for LiLo, she was licking on the wrong kind of Cash. UsWeekly (via Jezebel) is adding ‘”dick snatcher” to Lindsay Lohan’s already impressive resume, because they claim she flicked tongues and bumped gums with MiserAlba’s husband Cash Warren.

A witness said that on November 19 at Villa in West Hollywood, LiLo and Cash strolled into the joint with friends. After about 30 minutes, the two started mouth fucking in the darkness. The witness went on to say, “It was raw. They were not shy.”

I’m a little concerned that LiLo was partaking in a bareback make-out session. LiLo should always put two condoms on her tongue whenever she kisses on a bitch. And she should probably only do shit like that in the safety of a quarantine tent while two members of Hazmat supervise.

But LiLo tells UsWeekly that their witness must have assholes for eyes, because she would never get down like that with a married man. She said that they are just friends and working on a TV project together.

In all honestly, I doubt this is true. As far as I know, Cash Warren has not turned into a pile of dust. MiserAlba’s bitchface of destruction can do that. MiserAlba doesn’t need to pick up a golf club to destroy a bitch. Elin Nordegren should take lessons from her.