DUH Of DUHS: New Moon Is The #1 Movie At The Box Office

New Moon made a little over $140 million this weekend, giving it the third-biggest opening weekend of all-time behind The Dark Knight ($158.3 million) and Spider-Man 3 ($151.1 million).

On Friday, New Moon also set the record for the biggest single day opening with $72.7 million. AND it holds ANOTHER record for most advance ticket sales.

My guess is that the massive amounts of extra-chunky panty pudding that were produced while watching this mess also broke records. Seriously IN THIS ECONOMY, Swiss Miss should’ve been on hand to scoop up the millions of gallons of crotch custard off theater floors. They would’ve been set for the next 10 years.

Unfortunately, my ass didn’t get to see New Moon yet, because movie theaters still don’t sell pot brownies, absinthe slushies or peyote-laced popcorn at their concession stands.

Here’s the rest of the weekend box office. One of the big surprises is that people actually went to go see Sandra Bullock’s busted ass Kathie Lee Gifford wig in The Blind Side.

1. The Twilight Saga: New Moon – $140.7 million
2. The Blind Side – $34.5 million
3. 2012 – $26.5 million
4. Planet 51 – $12.6 million
5. A Christmas Carol – $12.2 million
6. Precious: Based on the Novel “Push” – $11 million
7. The Men Who Stare at Goats – $2.7 million
8. Couples Retreat – $1.9 million
9. The Fourth Kind – $1.7 million
10. Law Abiding Citizen – $1.6 million

Source: Box Office Mojo