Australia Is Not Happy With Brit Brit

Last week, an Australian official named Crocodile DUHdee warned her citizens that they might be disappointed after spending hundreds of dollars on tickets to Brit Brit’s show, because she doesn’t sing live. Well, she was proven right after about 200 fans walked out of Brit Brit’s show on Friday night in Perth. One disappointed audience member said the show was “boring” and “stiff.” Another audience member who paid $148 for her ticket added, “It was so impersonal. She did not interact with her audience.”

Popeater reports that Brit Brit’ tour promoter queefed at the claims and laid all the blame on the Australian media for trying to take our little Cheetoling down. He issued this statement: “Britney is aware of all this and she’s extremely upset by it. She’s a human being. I’m embarrassed, with such a big international entourage here with Britney, to be part of the Australian media when I see that kind of totally inaccurate reporting.”

Maybe they should print some kind of disclaimer on all tickets. But instead of warning people of the obvious (that she moves her mouth to a track), they should print this: YOU MUST BE UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF SOMETHING MIND-ALTERING BEFORE YOU ENTER THE VENUE. If those 200 people were bonged and boozed, they probably would’ve had the time of their lives. They also would have mistaken Brit Brit for Kim from Kath & Kim, but that would have been a very good thing.

Here’s Brit Brit trolling around Australia the other day. You can tell she’s got the sads, because her weepy chichis look like they could use a Kleenex, a hug and an upper.