That’s what came out of Joe Perry’s sessy mouth. Joe, who is starting to look like a hot dude version of Colleen Williams, told The Las Vegas Sun that Steven Tyler is hanging up his scarf indefinitely. Aerosmith recently got back from a show in Abu Dhabi, and as far as Joe Perry knows Steven Tyler isn’t going to be shaking his bones on stage anymore.
Joe said, “Steven quit as far as I can tell. I don’t know anymore than you do about it. I got off the plane two nights ago. I saw online that Steven said that he was going to leave the band. I don’t know for how long, indefinitely or whatever. Other than that, I don’t know.”
Joe has tried calling Steven to get the real story, but dude isn’t even trying to pick up the phone, “He’s notorious for that. That’s one thing I’ve learned to live with. I try to overlook it. I like to pick my battles. Frankly, the last few months I’ve been wanting not to rock the boat. I don’t want him canceling any more gigs. We really wanted to do these last four. We just kind of didn’t want to call him out or anything and get him anymore pissed off, for whatever reason. So we just let things lie. So we did the gigs and, like I said, I got off the plane and saw this online. That’s how I know about it.”
If Steven has quit that bitch, Joe says they will bring in a replacement (SIT DOWN, Janice Dickinson) and the show will go on, “As far as replacing Steve, it’s not just about that, it’s also four guys that play extremely well together, and I’m not going to see that go to waste. I really don’t know what path it’s going to take at this point, but we’ll probably find somebody else that will sing in those spots where we need a singer and then we’ll be able to move the Aerosmith up a notch, move the vibe up a notch.”
Steven Tyler performed at the launch party for the pyramids in Egypt, so it might be time for him to spend his days lying in his Golden Rest bed with a bag of caramel squares in his lap and Matlock on the tube.
That being said, STEVEN TYLER CANNOT BE REPLACED. There’s not a zombie in Zombieland that can hustle like he can. Well…..unless Larry King knows the words to “F.I.N.E.”