It’s White Oprah’s Turn At The (Hidden) Mic

The Lohan family’s “Best of the Worst Moments Special” continues thanks to Michael Lohan. Yesterday, Radar posted a taped phone conversation between Michael and LiLo. LiLo addressed the recording on her Twitter by saying that it was recorded years ago and accused her father of editing it for high drama.

LiLo also really ZING-ed it to daddy when she wrote, “I used to think. That he needed the book for dummies on learning how to be a father. Haha-he’s needs the book for dummies on HOW TO BE A MAN.” Don’t HA HA at Lilo. Such a thing exists. It’s called “Khloe Kardashian’s Official Website.”

In addition to all that, LiLo is also looking into filing criminal charges against her father. Well, White Oprah might want to co-sign LiLo’s upcoming lawsuit, because she’s the star of a new tape Radar has just released.

In the 30-second long clip from last year, White Oprah tells Michael that she has already tried to get their daughter into rehab. White Oprah says, “She’s really sad and really hurt and really…despondent. I told her not to go to L.A. at 18…she did. I couldn’t leave these other three kids to go get her and it was, like, a mess. You don’t even know what I’d go through trying to get her into, like, rehab and stuff. She’d like, punch me in the face, kick me out of the car…like you don’t know the shit I went through trying to get her an intervention by myself. It was very difficult.”

You’re not the only one who just smiled like a farting toddler when you read about White Oprah getting punched out by LiLo. I’m sure Michael will pull a tape of that incident out of his asshole and release it on Pay-Per-View very very soon.

But don’t wave a hot knife at Michael Lohan for releasing tapes of his family’s private phone conversation. Michael said that he really has no choice. It’s the only way to clear HIS good name, “I admit, I’m being a bit selfish in releasing the tapes. But I’m tired of being lied about. I’m tired of Dina and others making me out to be someone I’m not, so now I’m going to prove to the world who the real liars are.”

Silly me. Here I was thinking (not really) that Michael releasing the tapes was his strange way of trying to help his daughter. When all along it’s been The Michael Lohan Show with special guest Linday Lohan.