Yesterday, my ass posted a little story about how Jude Law’s one-night-fuck turned baby mama, Samantha Burke, sold the first pictures of her baby for $300k to Hello! Magazine. Well, here’s the cover of Hello! starring (warning: clear your throat before you read this) 24-year-old Samantha and her adorable bag of money. In the issue, Samantha tells her “amazing story.” I’ll save your eyeballs the trouble and give you the Cliffs Notes version.
Basically, Samantha rode on Jude Law’s raw peenus and one of his jizz fishies fed itself to her lady egg thus creating a fetus! Then Samantha pushed out her baby girl, slapped a price tag on her ass and sold her off to a magazine. The End. You’re totally amazed, right?
And Baby Sophia needs a DRANK! Homegirl looks like she’d rather be watching Sky Captain on a loop than pose for the cover of a magazine. But at least we got to see that Sophia inherited her daddy’s hairline (or lack thereof).
VIA Daily Mail