The Last Thing Jon Gosselin Needs Is A Milkshake

October 4, 2009 / Posted by:

Since Jon Grosselin doesn’t have a regular paying gig anymore, he’s hitting the ho stroll harder than. Jon’s first stop on the journey to relevancy was Millions of Famewhores in Los Angeles where he made a signature milkshake. The words “Jon Gosslin milkshake” should never ever be allowed to stand next to each other. Millions of Milkshakes should get an F from the health department just for having that shit on the menu.

I’m guessing a Grosselin shake consists of: Ed Hardy’s European beer, foam from the mouth of Kate’s rabid possum head, three dry hairs from Hailey Glassman’s meth brows, Michael Lohan’s enema water, Jon’s undertitty jam, a dozen rotten walnuts, a cup of lukewarm lard, and the tears of ten TLC executives.

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