Fighting Over Harvey

Harvey Price’s biological father, Dwight Yorke, has slithered out of the gutter and is now ready to raise him as his own. If this doesn’t deserve a FUCK OFF stamp from Harvey, I don’t know what does.

Dwight, who jumped out of the picture shortly after Harvey was born 7 years ago, told the News of the World that he’s always wanted to spend some time with his son, but Katie Price and Peter always put up a stop sign. Now that Peter isn’t married to Katie, Dwight wants to be Harvey’s full-time father. Dwight said, “Over the years I’ve heard Katie saying how Andre is Harvey’s dad and what a terrible, uncaring father I’ve been, all of which sticks in my throat. Maybe if she hadn’t made life so difficult for me, I might have been able to take a far more proactive role.”

Dwight also said that when he found out Peter wanted to adopt Harvey, he was ready to choke the jizz out of him ( try not to touch yourself). Dwight said, “And then they had the gall to talk about Andre adopting him. I so, so wanted to grab him around the neck and throttle him for his insensitivity. So close. Having put up with everything his missus had thrown at me, I now had to listen to this idiot lecturing me on fatherhood? I don’t think so. The guy’s a muppet.”

When the Daily Mail asked Peter about Dwight’s comments, he took the dick out of his mouth and responded with, “I do not hate Dwight and I didn’t realize he felt that way about me. But I have been a real father of Harvey and he calls me Daddy. I guess that sticks in Dwight’s throat.”

What’s all this “sticks in my throat” shit?! Obviously, Peter and Dwight want to 69 each other.

I’m sure Harvey regularly kicks Peter in the face and wakes him up in the morning by stomping on his stomach, but he does it out of love. That’s because Peter is his father. After all, the orange ‘mo helped raise Harvey. So Dwight needs to fill out an application, take a number and get to the back of the line marked “Bitches Who Want To Spend Time with Harvey.” And the line is looooong.