Who Will Save Your Soul? Mike Seaver Will!

Remember Kirk Cameron’s video rant from earlier this week about evolution, Darwin, Hitler (who is having the best week ever) and creationism? Understandably, Kirk got shit for it, but that isn’t stopping him from continuing to spread his message! Kirk told People that he’s on a mission to save the souls of our college freshmen. Kirk will visit colleges and universities to hand out a new 50-page introduction for Darwin’s The Origin of Species.

Kirk said, “Atheism has been on the rise for years now, and the Bible of the atheists is The Origin of Species. We have a situation in our country where young people are entering college with a belief in God and exiting with that faith being stripped and shredded. What we want to do is have student make an informed, educated decision before they chuck their faith. I am proud to bring this to people’s attention. You see things in the world that are truly distressing and you think, ‘What can I do?’ Well this is something I can do.”

And what would Kirk say if his children believed in evolution? Kirk responded, “I accepted a lot of things that are not true before I was able to sit down and listen to more then one side and think things through the issues. I would sit them down and tell them that I was happy that they were thinking about this stuff, now let’s look at all of the information and see if we don’t come to a better conclusion. If after that, they still come to the same conclusion, so be it.”

To be fair to some college students, it’s hard to be a drunken whore with no morals when you have to get up early on a Sunday to go to church. I don’t think anyone would appreciate them sitting in a pew with blood-shot eyes and crusty jizz on the corners of their mouths. It’s best for everyone if they stay home and attend the Church of Father Dowling.

And just so we’re clear, I know a ton of atheists who don’t consider The Origin of Species as their bible. Their bible is and will always be the cocktail menu at T.G.I. Friday’s.