Kelly Rutherford from Gossip Girl (or more importantly, the hooker with a heart of gold from the original Melrose Place) was granted a temporary restraining order against her estranged husband, Daniel Giersch, because she claims he is effing up her life with his threats and overall craziness. This is just the latest lukewarm butt nugget in the filthy dirty custody battle between Kelly and Daniel.
According to the documents, Kelly says Daniel has been following her, her nanny and her mother. This caused the nanny to quit, because Daniel would constantly harass her and ask her questions about Kelly. Kelly claims that last week, when the nanny wouldn’t give up any info, Daniel threatened to sue her ass. Kelly, who is a proud member of the La Leche League, also added that she can’t make enough titty milk for her 3-month-old, because Daniel has caused her stress. Does Kelly have Salma Hayek’s number in her rolodex, because she can squirt the leche under any condition! Bombs could be dropping around her, but that wouldn’t stop Salma’s “heal the world” chichis from feeding everyone.
The judge ordered that Daniel must stay at least 100 yards away from Kelly’s life. The only time he’s allowed near her home or car is when he’s on a court-ordered visit with their kids Hermes & Helena.
Daniel’s lawyer farted back at the claims and said Kelly is making it all up.
And I’m not Match.com or anything, but I think we need to set up a date (in a mental hospital) between Daniel and Anne “Celestia” Heche. That right there is a match made in straitjacket heaven.