Zooey Deschanel Married The Dude From Death Cab For Cutie

September 21, 2009 / Posted by:

Willie Nelson has nothing to do with this story, but the ole’ stoner should be in every picture. And he’s wearing a pineapple shirt, so it was a no-brainer. Anywaaaaay….

Zooey Deschanel married Ben Gibbard of Death Cab for Cutie on Saturday night in a town near Seattle, Washington. The two have been making soft and sometimes depressing music together for about two years.

Anybody who watched the episode of Top Chef: Masters that Zooey was on, knows that homegirl is a serious vegan who doesn’t even fart on gluten. She doesn’t touch the stuff. So I can only imagine what their wedding reception was like. They probably released everyone into an open field and let them graze on the grass like damn cows. Then they nibbled on some dandelions for dessert. If you wanted to booze it up, you had to eat fermented apples off the ground. I’m not joking. That’s totally what it was like.

My ass would’ve been evicted from that wedding for smuggling in a 6-piece from Popeye’s in my ass crack and a bottle of MD in my taint. I would’ve done it Newsome-style. Trust me, there’s room.

VIA People

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