Shut Your Mouths!

September 19, 2009 / Posted by:

At yesterday’s Values Voters conference in DC, reporters from both MSNBC (above) and Fox News (below) were told to shut their gaping whore mouths because the audience couldn’t hear the speakers. And they were so damn polite about it too! No punches were thrown, NO MICS WERE SNATCHED (nod to Kanye) and no children were hurt.

If this was an abuelita convention, chanklas would be up asses, wire hangers would be flying across the room and bitches would have knots in their heads. Seriously, if I ever interrupted my abuelita’s favorite novela (SPOILER ALERT: Carrusel), I’d get a slap in the mouth. And she’d wear all her biggest rings too.

I mean, look at Mumble McMumbles below. He’s trying to shush up the Fox News reporter, but I can’t understand a word he’s saying. If I was the reporter, I’d be really confused and just tell the dude I’ll have the veal with a glass of Merlot. Mumbles belongs in a Twin Peaks episode.

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