And you better have a spatula handy to peel yourself off the floor with, because he’s a shocker. The someone arrested was not Blohan herself! Dun! Dun! Dun! The plot thins.
People reports that 18-year-old Nick Prugo was busted yesterday morning for allegedly breaking into the homes of Blohan and Ceiling Eyes. Nick was charged with felony burglary and is currently cooling his nalgas in a jail cell on $20,000 bail. This isn’t Nick’s first time at the butt rape party. Nick was arrested last month and he was also convicted on September 4th for possessing a narcotic controlled substance.
White Oprah, who will never miss an opportunity to mouth queef to the media, immediately said this about Nick’s arrest: “Yes, we have found him, God is good.” God responded by saying, “White Oprah is bad.”
I’m still having a hard time believing that Sticky Snatch Lohan isn’t somehow involved in this herself. I mean, was that missing joo-ree from the Elle photo shoot ever recovered? Detectives should poke at Blohan’s bloated face lips, because I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s where she’s hiding the goods. Once they search her lips, they also might find her dignity and Ali Lohan’s youth stashed in there.