Katherine Hagel IS Going To Be A Mother

Yesterday, I posted the rumor that Katherine Hagel and her husband were going to adopt a baby from Korea. I filed it in the HAHAHAHAH pile, because I really can’t see Hagel coo-coo-ing into a baby’s ear or changing diapers without throwing a 2-hour cunty fit. Well, the rumor is true. Hagel confirmed the news on The Ellen DeGeneres Show in an episode airing tomorrow.

Hagel said they are adopting a 10-month-old special needs girl from Korea. Fun fact: Hagel’s sister was also adopted from Korea. Hagel added, “Her name is Naleigh. Well, I am naming her after my mother and sister Nancy, Leigh. So we call her Naleigh. She was actually born the day before me in November, which I thought was really serendipitous and just kind of like a sign. I realized just recently that I basically forfeited my birthday for the rest of my life. I wanted to tell everybody so you don’t think I stole a Korean baby.”

Nicotine, please! You know she’s not going to forfeit her birthdays. Poor Naleigh is only going to get a stale Twinkie with a half-burned candle in it for her birthday, because Hagel will be too busy planning her own party. But it’s nice to see that Hagel is still always thinking of herself.

And let’s hope the police don’t get the memo and arrest Hagel’s ass for stealing a Korean baby. If the police ask you about it, you don’t know anything!