STFU Phil Spector

First of all, try to control yourself. I know Phil Spector’s mug shot always makes you want to run out to the nearest costume shop, buy a Scrooge mask, boil it for 5 hours, let it cool and then wet hump it until you go raw….but you must resist. Just this time.

So…600-year-old Phil Spector is currently in the chokey for murdering Lana Clarkson. Phil is crying about the conditions and wants them to do something about it! Dude already wears a diaper, so it’s no surprise that he’s acting like a baby.

Phil is being moved out of the California Substance Abuse Treatment Facility & State Prison after he told officials that he feels like bitches are going to kill his ass in there. When Phil was told they were moving him to the Pleasant Valley State Prison in Coalinga, he freaked out again and said the place is riddled with Valley Fever. Apparently, 16 inmates died at the prison from Valley Fever within the past 4 years. Phil think he’s next.

Phil’s trophy wife is also whining for him and she told Page Six, “They are sending Phil there to die. He is scared to death. When I saw him on Saturday, he was shaking . . . He’s 70 years old and 130 pounds . . . We are trying to appeal over this, but he’s been told he has no time. He’s already been given his bus pass out of Corcoran.”

The prison officials should show Phil what’s it’s really like to suffer and throw him in a jail cell filled with mirrors. Seriously, I’d rather spend the rest of my life locked in one of the houses on Hoarders than have to look at that face of fugness every single day. Phil would be begging for a lethal injection shot up the ass in no time.