It’s Love!

Katie Price has only been rubbing her labia lips all over Alex Reid’s “Quasimodo after motorboating Aretha Franklin” face for five weeks, but he has declared that he’s in love love love with her! This isn’t surprising since Alex could probably fall in love with a dehydrated butt nugget if he stared at it long enough and a Carpenters song happened to be playing in the background.

Alex tells NOW Magazine (via DM), “We have an amazing connection. It’s something I can’t describe in words. We spend an hour just looking at each other in the eyes – it’s mad! I’ve never, ever, ever, felt like this. She questions me about it, and yes I’ve been in love, but I’ve never felt like this. I want to be with her all the time. I have told her I love her pretty much every day since we met. And about 50 million times a day.”

So, let’s see, they stare at each other for hours at a time (see “butt nugget” comment above) and all he says to her is “I Love You” over and over again. Basically, Katie is dating a talking baby doll with a half-melted Mickey Rourke mask over its head who says “I love you” every time she punchs it in the belly button? Sounds about right.

And in other news you can fart to, Katie has denied the rumors that she’s knocked up with Alex’s child. On her new reality show, Katie brought the cameras into the bathroom and let them film her as she pissed on a pregnancy test. Katie said, “They came in the toilet with me and they’ve watched it develop… I’m 100 per cent not pregnant, I’m 100 per cent not getting married… there’s no babies on the agenda.”

I’d rather watch Bobby Brown push out one of Whitney Houston’s doody bubbles in slow motion than watch Katie Price squatting over a stick. Well, unless is Harvey Price is in the room telling her to “fuck off.” That is the only thing that would make it watchable.

Here’s the two lovebirds going to the gym together yesterday and then going for a run.