Cats are better at this internet stuff than all of us! Not only can they ruin your life by framing you for downloading child porn, but they can also start a Facebook profile so that they can stalk your ex-junked-up-husband. The Sun says that Wino’s pussy, Shirley, now has her own Facebook page and is using it to post messages to Blaaaaaaaaaaaake.
Shirley, who might be lapping up a little heroin milk before she posts, wrote this message on his wall: “Oi mummy was saying to her friend about th time she made you breakfast an you drank all th nesquik til you was sick xxxxxxx.” In another message, Shirley’s paws typed out: “Sailor sort it you’re her co-hort. consort still. as you both know you’re unswerving. just as much as you’re deserving.”
Shirley’s charms have worked, because Blaaaaake quickly changed his relationship status from “Single” to “It’s complicated.” A couple of days later, “It’s complicated” became “MARRIED.”
And before you start thinking that Wino is pretending to be Shirley, think again. Do you really think Wino knows how to spell that well? Like she can really spit out more than 5 words without passing out on the keyboard. This is all Shirley. Just look at that picture of Shirley. You can tell she’s a slutty crackheaded puss who will stop at nothing to steal a bitch’s man. Wino, come get your life back from that skank Shirley!