Good News: Elisabeth Hasselcrack Won’t Be On The View For A While

August 10, 2009 / Posted by:

That’s because Elisabeth Hasselcrack is going on maternity leave after queefing a baby out yesterday afternoon in New York. UsWeekly says that Elisabeth and her husband Tim now have a baby boy they named Isaiah Timothy. Isaiah is the third Hasselbeck child after 4-year-old Grace and 20-month-old Tyler.

Congratulations to Whoopi and Joy on their ears getting a little vacation from Elisabeth’s hyena screeching. I hope that while Elisabeth is off annoying her newborn baby, The View saves some money IN THIS ECONOMY and replace her ass on the cheap with one of these choices: a bobble head doll that melted in the sun, Ann Coulter’s strap-on or a janky boombox playing a warped tape of Glenn Beck’s amazing “GET OFF MY PHONE” rant.

And you know that Isaiah’s first order of business is to learn how to use a phone so that he can call a lawyer and get those emancipation papers going.

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