Sarah Harding of Girls Aloud is one of my favorite drunk Brits. Bitch loves to lap up the sweet nectar and it shows. Look at her ass leaving a London club at 4 in the morning. Druuuunk. When your eyes are unintentionally doing an impersonation of Wonky McValtrex, you’ve got the drunks in a major way. Speaking of boozing, here’s a story/warning out of Boulder, CO that you should try to remember just when you’re about to pass out after a night of debauchery.
So, this 20-year-old chick was partying it up on the rooftop of her sister’s apartment building in Boulder. The girl’s sister said she had two tequila shots, two vodka lemonades and probably a couple of beers, but she wasn’t totally blitzed. The girl decided she had enough boozing, so she went downstairs to her sister’s fifth-floor apartment to sleep it off. About two hours later, her sister came to check on her and couldn’t find her ass anywhere in the apartment! It was about that time that an ambulance pulled up to the apartment building. The girl was lying on the grass below with a window screen near her! The bed the girl was sleeping in was right next to a window. You do the math.
The police think that homegirl accidentally rolled out of the window while she was sleeping. She was taken to the hospital for surgery and is currently recovering. Despite now having a phobia of sleeping next to windows, the girl will be fine.
This is why it’s sometimes best to blackout on your bathroom floor! Seriously, before you’re about to fall into a drunk coma, close every damn window and lock that bitch! And if you MUST have the window open, attach a bungee cord to your ankle just in case.