When Tony Romo dumps a ho, he really really dumps a ho. UsWeekly says that when Tony sent Jessica crying into Papa Joe’s open arms (wink from Papa to Tony), he immediately told the security at his gated community in Dallas not to let her in no matter what! Tony issued a red alert! Apparently, this sign is at the entrance:
“RED ALERT!!! TONY ROMO HAS MADE SOME CHANGES TO HIS LIST OF PEOPLE ALLOWED IN….JESSICA IS NO LONGER ON THE LIST AND NOT APPROVED FOR ACCESS.”
Jessica got moded (since I’m taking us back to sixth grade)! Seriously, Tony is such an asshole. Red alert? What is Jessica going to do? Sing him a love song a capella outside of his window to get him back? Lick his refrigerator and pantry clean while he’s gone? Marry him while he’s sleeping (takes notes, Aniston)? Okay, maybe he has a point. No, he doesn’t.
You know, this reminds of some crazy bitch I used to work with who told the really hot cholita receptionist not to let her boyfriend in, because he pissed her off that morning. So what did the cholita receptionist do when the boyfriend showed up? She flipped her perfectly feathered burgundy hair and said, “She’s in the break room. Go ahead.”
I really hope Tony’s security guards are just like that hot cholita receptionist.