A Giant Pot Of Reality Whore Stew

July 23, 2009 / Posted by:

The reality whores are mixing! The reality whores are mixing! Aaaack! Last night, I wrote some shit about how Jon Gosselin and Michael Lohan were spraying their douche juices all over Southampton together. Well, you can add a drop of Jill Zarin from The Real Housewives of NYC to the mix, because she was with them. AND Jon’s date wasn’t Hailey “meth brows” Glassyeyes. Jon must have handed Hailey her toy bong and told her to go play outside, because Kate Major was his date last night. Kate is the Star Magazine reporter Jon was seen with the other night. The famewhore scale just broke.

People says that Jon and TOK (The Other Kate) have been in the Hamptons for about three days. Jill Zarin said that Jon and TOK are definitely porking each other, but he isn’t exactly busting a million nuts over her, “He didn’t seem smitten. They weren’t all over each other. But they’re definitely dating. It came up in conversation. She had her hands on him. But she’s young. This is a girl who is going to want to have babies. Does he really want to go out with another young girl and have kids?

Michael Lohan (of course) added that even though Jon is skipping around with a bunch of hos, his thoughts are really with his child army, “He talks about them. He’s on the phone with them all the time. But unfortunately, as I well know, being a father in a divorce, it’s really hard on the kids. And you just want to be with them all the time. But sometimes our exes don’t make it that easy.”

Hold me close. This is scary on so many levels. Michael Lohan, Jill Zarin and Jon Gosselin sharing a meal together?! I’m surprised that when they clinked their glasses during a toast, a fiery pit didn’t appear in the middle of the room with Heidi and Spencer jumping out of it. Obviously, it’s only a matter of time before Jon starts hanging out with those assholes. Ugh.

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