Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

Could it be that a certain gay blade has shaved off one beard and grown another? It’s one thing to hang out with that friendly filly who has known her way around a queen or two. Now he’s clinging onto a more desperate dame who, if I’m not mistaken, never met a gay man she didn’t like. His undeniable charms have worked pretty well in the past – his breakthrough happened when he focused on a guy mentioned in this very column. That time, he landed a series. The only thing that could happen with this b* is he’d shrink half a foot and lose all his hair. (Billy Masters via Blind Gossip)

This sounds like Bradley Cooper, but I never got the feeling that his unicorn horn tingles for the peen. I guess the filly is Jennifer Aniston and the other one is Squinty Zellweger? Sarah Jessica Parker better step it up, because she has always been the official homo-lovin’ horsey.

Damage control! Which hard-partying actor rushed back to his local AA chapter when he was caught drinking, but is actually still on the sauce? (Gatecrasher)

The Christmas tree attacker himself, Kiefer Sutherland?

This young star, who is swearing he is actually a very good and chaste young man, is actually anything but. We hear that he is sleeping with the wife of one of his handlers, and she is also a good deal older than him. Not Zac Efron. (Buzz Foto via Blind Gossip)

I’m mad at this blind item, because I instantly got an image of David Archuleta nibbling on a cougar with his baby teefs. Ugh.